Stupid Cupid
by HanajimaFB
Summary: Guess who plays cupid this Valentine's day? *SLASH WARNING* Some guy/guy girl/girl guy/girl stuff
1. Default Chapter

A/N: There's some swearing, soon to have boy/boy, girl/girl and boy/girl stuff, and stupidity. None of this was meant to offend. This is pure fiction. Flames aren't accepted, but opinions are. 

Disclaimer: I don't own the SSB:M. What? I don't! READ DAMN YOU!

It was a beautiful morning day. The sun was perched in the soft blue sky and the birds whistled their tune of love. It's the morning of Valentine's Day. Most of the Smash brother's crew was cheerful and excited of this day's events and festivities. Most was the key word.

            The young blonde boy we know as Young Link crammed his head between the two bent sides of his pillow and plotted the barbeque of the songbirds. He HATED this holiday. Everyone goes soft and mushy inside. The arenas are closed so there was no fighting or battles what so ever. Plus, he didn't have many dates. This time, it's all going to change; in the way he knows it and the way he doesn't. The curtains in his room violently split open. He groaned and faced the opposite position.  

            "Wakey wakey kiddo." His older self lightly shook him. 

            "Go 'way" he moaned. 

            "Fine fine…" Link casually walked to the door, but turned around. "DOG PILE!" Young Link's eyes shot open. On some mornings, most of the guys at the dorm "wake" each other up by jumping on them or dragging them out. This wasn't his day. The blonde child pretty much fell off his bed and jumbled to his feet. He glared at the laughing Link on the doorframe. 

            "Sorry kid, it was the only way! Too bad you didn't know that the guys are getting ready for today," he snickered. The very unhappy youngster punched his taller self in the abdomen and left to prepare himself for another day. 

            ***

            As for the girls, well, they seemed to be excited. Maybe not for Samus or Sheik. Sheik was deeply absorbed in a book while Samus fixed and oiled her suit. Zelda and Peach chatted away about their boyfriends as Nana and Jigglypuff enjoyed a game of cards. Peach noticed that they were the only ones taking. To get everyone involved, she brought up the topic of guys. 

            "Anyone interested in anyone. Love or like wise? Be truthful now." She looked at each one of the girls and waited. Samus shrugged along with Sheik. 

"I have a small crush on Kirby….A veerrry small crush! Tiny tiny, itty bitty," Jigglypuff explained. The ladies shook their heads and agreed with her for her amusement. It was too obvious anyway. Nana looked uneasy. 

            "How about you Nana?" Zelda softly spoke. 

            "Well…." She began. "Um…"

            "We won't tell anyone," Peach assured her. 

            "I-I-I…uh…" she started to blush. Sheik smirked behind her mask.

            "We understand if you don't want to tell us," Samus said. Peach shot an "I wanna know" look at Samus. The space female innocently shrugged.

            "But, if you tell us, we might be able to fix you up with him," Zelda made a temping offer. Jigglypuff looked angry, but Peach whispered to her that she'd get the same treatment.

            "I guess….I guess I could tell you…" Nana looked extremely nervous.

            "Go on…" Sheik ushered. 

            "I….I like…" she mumbled her crush's name at the end. It didn't really matter because her answered seemed to be replaced by an annoying "Oh how cute!" scream. 

            ***

            This day was bad, but it didn't have to get worse. Young Link tapped his foot in annoyance while leaning on the wall connected to the bathroom door. 

            "Are you guys done yet!?" he cried out for the tenth time.

            "Nope," was the usual answer. He grunted in anger, deepening his frown. Most of the guys jumbled and fought over the mirror in the bathroom; not allowing Young Link to brush his teeth. He slouched in defeat. Stupid Valentine's Day. 

            "I'm almost done! Geez man!" Marth stumbled out of the view of the mirror and was replaced by Link.

            "Oh yeah, I look good," Link did something similar to his taunt.    

            "Move before you crack the mirror!" Roy shoved the "pretty boy" out of the way and started checking his hair.

            "You're hair's always in clumps. Shoo! The beautiful people need this more than you!" Captain Falcon added Roy to the "rejects" and flexed his biceps. 

            "Damn, I'm gorgeous," he flashed a prince charming smile. 

            "Here, take it and move!" Ganondorf shoved a bottle of mouth wash in the self centered one's hands while pushing him away.  Yep, this seriously sucks. Young Link stood up in hope as Popo approached. He was never the morning person. The Ice climber's hand jiggled the knob to the bathroom. Glaring, he pulled out his hammer and made three nice dents on the door. 

            "Open up, you losers! I don't have the fucking time!" Young Link wasn't surprised with his language. Popo did have an unusual amount of explosives stuffed all around his room. He claims it for his journeys on Icicle Mountain. The blonde boy smiled for the first time that day with the door creaked open. The boasting boys quickly exited and Popo entered, slamming the door behind him. At least Young Link won't wait too long. Since the coast was clear, Yoshi walked towards the small swordsman with a rectangular box.

            "Here. I got it in the mail," the dinosaur handed to Young Link. Yoshi went along with his business, wondering why Young Link hugged him. The part archer would've ripped open the package if Popo weren't there to remind him that it was his turn at the sink. Eh, he'll tear it up in there. 

            ***

            "I think she's a nice rose pink," Peach picked up a tube of lipstick.

            "No way. It's definitely a fruit punch red," Zelda glimpsed at the cap of her choice color. 

            "Um…girls…" Jigglypuff tried to speak, but was over come by bickering of the two princesses. Samus ignored them by playing an Mp3 she downloaded in her suit. Sheik was er..."teaching" Nana some self-defense.

            "If he ever gets fresh with you, kick him at the part where his legs connect to his body," Nana didn't understand what "fresh" meant, but nodded.  Sheik picked up a tiny spray bottle. 

            "This, my dear, is pepper spray. Use it on guys that are too touchy. Handle it with care. It's your friend." The sister of Popo tucked it away in her coat. 

            "Well…Link loves me more!"

            "No way! Mario's the best!"

            "I feel that it isn't about the lip stick anymore…" Jigglypuff sulked. 

            "Girls! Shut up! I can hear you over my music!" Samus halted the soon to be catfight. Zelda placed a hand on her hip and glanced at the bounty hunter. 

            "Then, how will we prepare Jigglypuff?" she asked. 

            "Headwear?"

            "Of course!" Peach squealed. "She'll wear a cute princess crown like mine!"

            "Like hell. She'll gonna have a nice red flower. She'll dazzle all the guys!" Zelda went into her ga-ga daydreaming mode.

            "You're both wrong!" Sheik contributed. "A kick ass headband will show that she's not the type to be messing around with."

            "No! King Kirby and Queen Jigglypuff!"

            "I'll show you royalty! A royal ass kicking!"

            "Very tasteless Zelda." Samus gently pushed Nana out the door.

            "Um…you'll understand when you get older."

            ***

            Young Link quietly stepped into his room and locked the entrance. After pulling the curtains together, he pulled out a long bag from the box. Darting his eyes around, he slowly zipped open the bag. He looked like a kid on Christmas morning, expected the smile. His grin held evil and his eyes showed big plans. Ironically, he ordered love arrows. Golden love arrows. He read the fine print on the box. 'After being struck by an arrow, the first person who he or she sees will be his or her one true love. But only for a day.' 

            "One day?! Damn." He mused for a while. "Maybe I should test them out…" Smirking, he put the bag on his back and grabbed his bow.


	2. Begin the chaos!

A/N: Sorry this is short. I rushed. Stupid school. And I don't think I'll be finishing this by V-day. 

After carefully choosing a good hiding spot, Young Link aimed one of the love arrows at a random person. The first lucky winner was…

            "Ouch! What the hell?!" Link pulled off a now-brass arrow from his tush. His younger self watched Link continuing his trip down the hall. Lo and behold, Samus was consoling Nana about something. She became the sexiest woman he had ever laid eyes upon. He seemed to know that there was beauty beyond the suit. A sudden mood swing empowered Link to hug the mecha girl. She wasn't as happy as the snuggling elf.

            "Will I have to be all grown up to know about what he's doing too?" Nana asked. Samus nodded, looking annoyed. She didn't want to turn him into a bloody pulp with Nana around. The little girl took the hint and left. The pretend cupid watched his future self get flung back to the boys' dorm and repeatedly shot. 

"Freaking perverted cross dresser! Why the FUCK did you do that?!" This proved to be entertaining. Now, for victim number two. 

            Out of curiosity, Nana came back to see what was going on. Young Link grinned like a psychopath as Marth came to shield Nana from the traumatizing images that may come.

            "You're new name will be the child molester..." he whispered and fired another arrow. It hit home. 

            "That's smarts!" Marth removed the arrow from his arm and glazed upon Nana. He was in awe at her innocence and looked glazed with astonishment. Nana became very uncomfortable. 

            "Girls...Marth's looking at me all funny…" The ladies in the dorm room quickly burst through the door. Zelda was the first to speak.

            "Back off sicko or I'll set you're emblems on fire!" she threatened. Marth gulped. He held up his hands in surrender and made a mad dash down the hall. Peach gave Nana a motherly hug.

            "He didn't touch you, did he?" she gently asked. 

            "Nope," she honestly replied. They let out a sigh of relief. Jigglypuff then stepped out.

            "What happened?" she asked. Young Link's face went red from holding back the laughter. The girls didn't seem to make up their minds. Jigglypuff wore thick blue shadow on one eye and moss green on the other. Her hair was tied in a blue bow with a crown, flower and headband on. Her top lip was pink while the bottom was purple. Both her cheeks where puke yellow. 

            "She looks like a blind prostitute…" he snickered. "Let's see if any of the girls would fall for her…" he snatched an arrow and fired it as Zelda. Unfortunately, Sheik caught it in time. She glared at where the object came from. Young Link took out the cloaking device and tip toed before any questions were asked.

***

            The next stop for the corrupting cupid was the storage room. He needed another clocking device. Besides, the one that he's wearing now is starting to blink the image of his body. He froze when her hear beeping. The clicking sounds game from Mr. Game and Watch. His 2d self was in Young Link's sight. A shimmer of wonderment flash upon his cerulean eyes as he reached for another love arrow. Who would he fall for? The string of the bow launched the projectile to the old school character.  Instead of pulling out the arrow, Mr. Game and Watch flew into the storage room with a clatter of beeps, clicks, and buzzes. Pinned to the wall, he tried to pull on the arrow from his large nose. Young Link stifled a laugh when he picked up a couple more cloaking devices. Feel pity for the struggling man, he pulled it out for him. Mr. Game and Watch rubbed his nose and looked around for the person who shot it. He did a double take when his eyes met the sandbag. (A/N: Hey, it moves, blinks, takes damage, and stands.) Yes the sandbag; the recent beauty…thing. The large eyed punching bag looked extremely confused while black hearts with white lining floated around.  A light hug added to its bewilderment. Another romantically involved person passed by; dashing in a blur.

            "SAMMMUUUSSS!!! I LUVVVV YOUUU!!"

            "Keeprunningkeeprunningkeeprunningkeeprunning!"

            'Hmm…maybe I should screw that couple up more...' and Young Link was chasing them. 

***

            Roy watched his sparring partner heave another sigh. This was way past worry. It's annoying.

            "What the hell is your problem, Marth?" he asked. "It's V-day! You can grab chicks with shinny things 'n' shit."

            "Oh, my simple minded friend. You can't buy love." He sighed again.  "Her heart is pure gold anyway."

            "Ugh. Stop it with the Romeo crap. Save it for later. Who is this chick anyways?" Roy watched Marth finally grin. 

            "If I tell you, you must promise not to take her away."

            "Fine fine. Now, what's her name?!"

            "Her name…is lik-"

            "No more of that shit! Spit it out!"

            "Her name is Nana." The red head's mouth gapped open.

            "Whoa…what? I know you're desperate but not the desperate, are you?" The blue hair prince nodded. 

            "Maybe I should try to capture her heart again…" the love deprived man left the room in search of his "one and only". Minutes after Marth's departure, Samus burst in the room and locked the door shut. 

            "I'msorrytobargeinbutineedtouseyourclosetjustrealyfastkay?" she explained. Roy just held his expression of confusion and surprise. 

            "I know you're playing hard to get!" cried a singsong voice from outside. 

            "Link? Is that you?"

            "Roy? Can you let me in?" Samus poked her unshelled head from the closet. She glared at Roy, telling him not to let the hero of time in. He nodded and let Link bang on the door.  Soon, an unruly Samus burst out of the room and allowed Link to follow. Roy tired to get the color back in his face. Young Link stood, unseen, at the doorway. He eyed Roy and thought how to fuck up his love life. Then the real Samus appear out of the closet.(A/N: I don't really know what Samus looks like so I made it up ^^;; It is fiction…) She was nicely figured with shoulder length brown hair. Her eyes were green and she was wearing a muscle shirt with mid-thigh shorts. Her light peach skin was covered in sweat. Both the boys looked at her in surprise. Roy paled at the fact that there were two Samuses. He glanced at her when she walked out the door. 

            "Stop staring and keep thinking," Was her reaction to the ogling. Young Link found another target. 

***

            Sheik stretched her arms inches above the rail of the balcony. The glow of the sunset comforted her. Working with the princesses really stressed her out. She heard the clanking of Samus' boots and turned to see why she was rushing. A light "zoom" sound came with the wind that fluttered Sheik's bangs. 

            "Hey, where's the fir-" before she could finish, she was cut off by Link. 

            "Be my Valentineeeeee!!!" another swoosh of air tangle with her blonde hair. She watched then with her crimson eyes.

            'Ooh, I'm telling Zelda…' she thought. The human form of Samus stepped beside her. 

            "Ack!" Sheik almost fell off the balcony. "There's two Samuseseseseses!"

            "Nah, just one." She pointed to herself. "The other one was just my suit. I can program it as a de-coy." 

            A twang of string echoed to Sheik's ear. Jerking her head the source, she saw nothing. 

            "Ow!" Samus turned around and had an arrow stuck her shoulder. She pulled it out and discarded it. 

            "What? What happened?" Sheik wanted answers. Samus locked her eyes to Sheik's for a while and blushed.

            "N-nothing…" she held her glance. Why did she find the female attractive? Was it her tomboy-ish charm? Or her strength? This was all too fast. Something told her that she was in love with Sheik. Of all people. Moving her eyes away, she started to sweat. The alter ego of Zelda asked her why she was so red. Samus tried to change the subject.

            "Hey, Sheik, I never seen you without your mask off. Can you show me?" she bit her bottom lip after that. Raising an eyebrow, Sheik pulled down the cloth that covered her lips.

            "There, happy?" 

            'Oh crap, they can move!' Samus thought. Strangely, her heart rate increased with every breath her lungs took. An intense look swam in her eyes. Another coat of sweat covered her face. Taking a gulp, she dove in for a kiss. 

A/N: BWAHAHAHAHA!!!


	3. Next Chapter!

A/N: Sanku to da people who review. I thought about some of you people's ideas and mixed 'n' matched with mine's. Eh, I don't rant much, sowwy.   

This totally took Sheik off guard. Her eyes shot wide open. 'What the hell is she doing?!' she mentally asked herself. Sheik tried to move, but was trapped between Samus and the railing. The Roy-in-hiding was drained of all his color alongside the arrow shooter. 

            "Holy shit! Lesbo orgy!" what wonderful timing Mewtwo had. Samus snapped her head to his direction to the voice. Sheik took this chance to escape. She jumped off the railing and disappeared in a cloud of ashy gray. Hearing the news, Link paused right in front of them. Saums' eye twitched as she stomped to the event exaggerator. What replace her happiness in her eyes was blood lust and murder. A lovely mix. Logically, the pokemon teleported far far far away from the pissed off chick. Link, blinded by love, tried to comfort her.

            "Don't worry, you still have me…" he wrapped his slender arms around her waist. She wickedly grinned, the side of her mouth twitching. 

            "Yes…" she hissed through her teeth. "I still have you…" Still in her psycho bitch mode, she released her anger by socking Link in the gut. Relaxing a bit, she continued her search for Sheik. Roy went to aid a friend in need by checking on the groaning fighter scrawled on the floor. (A/N: He's HURT in a non pleasurable way.) Kneeling down, he held up his head and checked if he was still breathing. The blonde knight labored and gulped for air. Young Link took his chance. 

            "This won't be the only thing that's going up you're ass…" a hum softly filled the air and the arrow pierced Roy in the butt. Jerking forward in surprise, he grumbled at the uncomfortable feeling. He removed the object to bring him relief. The semi motionless form in his arms coughed and drew the attention of the fire user. 

            "Link…can you hear me?" his voice soft and his eyes glossy with admiration. A set of blue eyes gingerly met Roy's. 

            "Yeah…" he wheezed. Link felt himself get lifted, his arm around Roy's shoulder. 

            "I'll take you back, okay?" his voice was pure concern. Link nodded and they slowly made their way to the boys' dorm.

***

            Nana was bored. The girls still fussed and fumbled over Jigglypuff and both Samus and Sheik were nowhere to be found. She then decided to bug her brother. She still thought of other entertaining things to do while walking. She smiled as one idea crossed her mind. Fireworks. She knocked on the door and waited. Popo yanked open the door. 

            "Oh, hey sis," he greeted and allowed her in. "Ya need something?"

            "Can I have your fireworks? I'm in need of amusement." 

            "I guess." He slid open his closet and dug through the pool of explosives. Marth stumbled out of his top bunk bed. Nana was here. After "careful" thinking, Marth fixed up a charming pick out line. He quickly smoothed out his hair and approached her in a "cool" way. Nana giggled and thought of a penguin when he walked. He smirked at her and spoke.

            "If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I'd be walking in my garden forever." Nana was confused but then figured out what he was doing. 

            "Popo…Marth's hitting on me…" her eyes still looking at the love stricken fool. 

            "Then hit him back!" he didn't fully understand what she met. 

            "Kay." She pulled out her hammer and took Sheik's advice. Ouchies for Marth. Popo brought her fireworks and stared at Marth curled up on the floor. 

            "Uh…what did you do?"

            "I hit him." He shook his head

            "Eh…I better get some ice…"

***

            "In the end, it doesn't really matter…" Falco was relaxing with his headphones on. He liked the spring weather. So did Fox apparently. The mammal hybrid snoozed on the grassy floor of the garden thus drooling and snoring followed. That was the reason for the music. Falco took the liberty to bring out a fold out chair to lie on.  They didn't bother to notice the floating fire flower that was freshly picked by the unseen Young Link. They also didn't see the free falling Sheik. 

            "Zzz…oof!" Fox didn't like his alarm. "Ahh!! The she-male! Get it off!" His alarm didn't like him much ether. 

            "It!?" she growled while sitting on his stomach.  She delightfully squished him with her knees. Fox seemed to like the word "Ow" since he repeatedly said it.

            'Ooh, Love-hate relationship.' The evil mind of Young Link brought his hands to discharge another arrow with a heart shaped head at Sheik. The choking and straggling turned into hugging and cuddling. Falco started laughing at the two. 

            "Awww…is widdle Foxy man shy?" she purred, gently rubbing the back of his ear with her fingers. He grit his teeth in annoyance and fear.

            "Get…it…off…now!"

            "Is that how you speak to your future wife?"

            "A what?!" after the panic button was pushed from Sheik's comment, he speedily zipped out of her grip. He then used the energy from his paranoia to be chased by the female-manic.  Falco shrugged. Hey, love is in the air. The feathered hybrid blinked at the discarded arrow on the floor. Young Link tipped toed away with a Lipstick. 

***

            "And…there. You're done." Zelda leveled a mirror to Nana's face. A bright smile brimmed her lips. Peach clapped her gloved hands together and squealed with excitement. 

            "You look sooo cute! He's not going to pass up a face like yours!" Nana blushed. She did, in fact, look adorable. She didn't wear her parka this time. Her extensive auburn hair was held in a ponytail and soft curled bangs hung from the sides of her face. She wore tiny, pink, heart shaped earrings that seemed to glow. No make-up was applied because she was too young and they claimed to have seen a natural beauty. Her brown wool cloves were replaced with long, silk, pink ones, like Peach's.  Her slender dress showed her favorite color, pink. The bottom of the dress only floated to her ankles. She had comfortable slippers that were light enough for her to waltz in. Zelda checked her Sailor moon clock. 

            "It's almost time. Were you able to find him?" she asked.

            "Not today. I've seen Marth a lot though." This worried the girls. A knocking from the door turned their attention away from the odd crush. Peach went to answer the door. It was the uncloaked Young Link. 

            "Hey Peach. Where's Zelda? I got something from Link to give to her," he tried not to snicker. Peach moved out of the way for him to deliver his gift. 

            "Surprise surprise!" he held up his flower. Zelda tried to protest.

            "No! That's a-*FWOOOOSSSSHHH*…fire flower." Zelda was charred from the waist up. Her hair was fixed in all the wrong places. Peach started to giggle. Soon she couldn't contain herself and began to laugh. 

"She could pass as a Mrs. Game and Watch," Peach joked. Jigglypuff joined in the laughing with Young Link. Nana was too busy blushing to notice.

            "GRRR!! You little brat!" Zelda chased the younger version of her boyfriend out the door. Young Like stuck his tongue out and ran away laughing. She slammed the door behind her and locked herself in the bathroom. 

            "You've got taste, Nana," Peach commented. Nana gave a nervous smile.

***

Link was able to catch his breath after relaxing a bit. He was still resting. Roy was seating at his side.

"Geez, what drove you to hug someone in a ravenous mood?" Roy joked. Link smiled and made Roy blush.

"Well…I do love her." Roy looked a bit downed. 

"Truthfully?" 

"With all my heart. Well…even though she likes Sheik."

"Wow. You're really persistent huh?"

"Mmm hmm…" he paused and looked at Roy. "Who do you like?"

"I..er…you really wanna know?" he asked

"Yes"

"You sure?"

"Yup"

"You're sure you're sure?"

"Yeah."

"Positive?"

"Absolutely."

"You really really wanna kn-"

"Yes godamnit, I want to know who you like!" Roy poked his two pointer fingertips together. 

"Can I give you hints?"

"Sure, I guess…" Roy took a deep breath and looked at his crush's features.

"Well…he..er…she…er..this person has blonde hair…"

"Yeah?"

"Blue eyes…"

"And?"

"A nice smile…"

"Wait! I got it!" Roy looked surprised. He got the guess with three clues?

"It's Peach huh?" he said with a sly smile. Roy shook his head.

"Zelda?"

"Nope." Link was now confused. 

"Who then?" Roy smiled. 'This is you're chance, now take it!' he thought. 

He moved his softly blushing face closely to Link's and silently gave him the answer. 

A/N: Oy, my chapters better stop ending this way. 


	4. Part 4

A/N: Sorry for the delay people. I had crap to do/go to. Remember: If it seems like I'm bashing a character, my bad. This is not meant to offended anyone

Link's lips were quickly released. He stared at Roy in shock and confusion. The red head turned away, in fear of the reaction. He felt so ashamed and dirty. 'Eh, I can't blame the guy. I am super hot.' Link inwardly smiled at the thought. The blonde tried to keep the mood on a high note. He still was his friend. 

            "Where'd you learn to kiss like that?" Roy was surprised. He wasn't mad?

            "W-What?" He turned back to face him. "You're not grossed out or anything?"

            "Why should I be? You're a person, I'm a person. People can love each other, right?" 

            "I guess…" he looked at Link. Not a trace of anger was found. What was happening? Roy smiled, but doubted that Link would love him back. He tried to make the best of it, so he hugged him.

            "You're so understanding…" he whispered. 

            "Ow ow ow…thanks…ow…" he tried to smile.  Roy released him. 

            "Sorry…" they paused for a moment. The spying Young Link slowly became bored. Maybe he should spice things up a notch. (A/N: He really likes to screw his older self over.) He held an arrow out and thought about what he should do. 'Hm…if I do get him to like Roy, it would make him happy. But…knowing him, he'd try something…intimate.' He growled as he remembered the way too happy Link and Zelda some nights ago. Young Link wanted Zelda, but he wanted Link to suffer. The evil grin returned. He shot the arrow at Link. 

            "Shit!" Link shot up and held his foot. Roy pulled out the arrow.  

            "What are these things?" Roy examined the weapon. 

            "Dunno," he rubbed the aching spot. He then returned to his laying position. Roy peered over his face to pretend to see if he's ok. Link's eyes locked onto his. Love has now tormented his heart. This time, who he loved, loved him back. Link's trembling fingers brushed on to Roy's hair and around his neck. The prince was confused. Did he change his mind? No matter, they were in "love". Roy smiled as he began to recapture his lover's lips. Young Link waited for a while until some pieces of clothing were subtracted. He made his way to a dresser opposite of them. He carefully placed a small camera that was fixed to record Roy and Link. He exited, rubbing his palms together. He loves using blackmail.

*** 

Lucky for Fox, he was fast. The bad thing is, Sheik was faster. The normally quick Fox wished for a bunny hood. Falco was right behind them, recording what was going on. 'Can't wait to show this to the guys,' he mentally snickered. He was another fan of using blackmail. They've been running around the garden for a while now. Maybe Fox was too panicked to run into a room or somewhere sheltered. Young Link was enjoying the chaos he created. He was soon un-amused and thought of re-using the blackmail plan. But, instead of taping the action, he'll just stir up some more trouble than it already is. The golden haired boy retrieved a love arrow and used Falco as a target. 

"Fuck!" was Falco reaction to the arrow. He whipped his camera to the source, and saw nothing. He grumbled and returned his viewpoint to the screaming he-mammal. Unknowingly, he was zooming in on Fox's tail. As soon as he realized this, he dropped the camera. 'What am I doing?' he thought. He gazed at the two and remembered Sheik was there. For some reason, he was pissed. 'That bitch better stay away from him.' He glared at her. 

"Now now, Foxy dear…no need to be scared. I don't bite." Her greedy eyes store him down. The victim was now trapped in-between a stonewall and Sheik.

"Isn't bestiality illegal?!" he gulped. 

"Everything's fair in love and war…" her lust filled eyes shone down on him. Falco used his remaining energy to take down Sheik and rapidly move her out of Fox's sight.

"Stay AWAY from him!" he ordered, jumping back to his co-pilot's side.

"Thanks man," Fox smiled in appreciation to his friend. Falco blushed lightly.

"No problem. I always knew you needed the savin'" he smirked and teasingly flicked Fox's ear.  The dizzy victim of Falco blinked hard enough to see the two. 

"You stupid pigeon! He's MINE! M-I-N-E!" she narrowed her eyes at the bird.

"Shuddap ya crazy bitch," Falco matched her glare. With a growl, Sheik tackled Falco, starting a fight. Dust picked up at the two fought. Blue feathers and needles sprung out randomly. Fox decided to leave before he was pinned to a wall or worse. 

***

"FOOD!" 

"FOOD!"

"FOOD!"

"FOOD!" the cries were followed by their owner gulping up something. Kirby stuffed his little face at the buffet table. Yoshi tried to get the most out of the fruit selections while Bowser guzzled down two barrels of beer. Donkey Kong just ate almost everything but the table. (Yes the table cloth too.) Kirby growled at anyone who got near the food. Ganondorf now thought twice before reaching for an apple. And he had a lot of time to think in the egg he was in. Pikachu and Pichu were the only ones fast enough to grab something. Pikachu was lapping up some ketchup from the bottle while Pichu snacked on an apple. Samus, now in her suit, watched them. She calmed down a bit now, thanks to Captain Falcon who is now using Freezes as if he lived in Alaska.  Mr. Game and Watch tried to dance with the sandbag. All he could do was spin the sandbag, making it dizzy. So he did the robot. Luigi was enjoying a waltz with Daisy and inwardly snickered at the two Marios. 

"I'm smarter!" Dr. Mario tugged on Peach's right hand.

"I'm stronger!" Mario pulled on the left.

"I can heal you!" 

"I can and HAVE saved you!" a beer bottle was flung at his direction. "Ow!" And people were supposed to enjoy Valentine celebrations. Young Link peeked in from the window. 'Pink pink pink. Esh.' He thought. 'Did Peach pick the decorations?' He rethought that and shook his head. 'Of course. How stupid of me.' His aqua eyes darted from person to person. He kept his eyes on Zelda and speculated at what or who she was tucking at.

"Oh, silly dear! You look wonderful!" Zelda tried to keep a sweet voice while trying to pry Nana away from a celing lamp. 

"No way! What if he's not there?!"

"Then wait for him! Don't you like him?" Nana looked down at the blonde. 

"Alright alright." Nana hooked a string on the lamp and slid down. She huffed and slowly walked to the party room. Some people took small glances at the glacier climber while she searched for her brother. Her crush was looking for Marth. 'I wonder what the idiot will do now?' he thought. As on cue, the lights in the room dimmed.  Music started up slow and it sounded like something from a boy-band. Two circles of light shone on Marth and Nana. Marth had a mike in his hand. Everyone was curious on what was going on. 

"When the visions around you," he started. "Bring tears to your eyes. And all that's around you are secrets and lies." His voice was actually beautiful. The prince some what danced to her. 

"I'll be your strength, I'll give you hope, keeping your faith when it's gone."  The spotlight followed every step he took. And every step he took was scaring the hell out of Nana. 

"The one you should call, is standing here all alone…" Marth gave his best Bambi eyes.  Zelda was stunned by his actions, but looked love sick in a way. Popo was just plain sick. 

"And I will take, you in my arms, and hold you right where you belong." Young Link lucky that the music was loud. The boy as at the edge of suffocating from the lack of oxygen he kept losing from laughing so hard.

"'Till the day my life is through, this I promise you." The blue haired teen smiled at her. 

"This I promise you." he slid down on his knees and brimmed a larger smile at her. 

"It's N'sync! Oh. My. GOD!!!" Peach was jumping up too much that the surrounding people tied her to a chair and clogged her screams with an apple. Marth sang into the mic but only ear torturing feedback was given. Popo unplugged random wires.

"You sick PERVERT!" the smaller boy glared hellfire at Marth. Nana took her time to sneak away while her over-protective brother pounded the future king into fine ground coffee. 

***

            Young Link was lying on the grass near the party room's window. His heart was beating rapidly and his lungs refilled with the need air. 'Maybe I should do this next year.' He grinned as he thought about what new evil plans he could use. His train of thought was broken when Nana was walking towards him. 

            "You…you ok?" she peered over to check his face.

            "You can see me?" he asked with an expression of bewilderment. Ok, that answered Nana's question.

            "Am I…not suppose to see you?" 

            "Well…uh…was anyone looking for me?" he took nervous glances side to side. Nana blushed.

            "M-maybe…" 

            "Ok Nana! You can come back in now!" Popo shouted from a near by window. Young Link grabbed his gear and took off when Nana responded.

            "Oh, alright." She sighed and turned around. "I guess I'll-huh?"

            "Hurry up Nana! They're dragging Marth to the hospital!"

            "Popo, you have problems."

***

            "99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer! Take one down, I lost count, 99 bottles of beer on the wall! 99 bottles of beer on the wall…" Bower was "sharing" his musical talent with the slew of fighters. 

            "I never thought it was possible for that big guy to drink 4 gallons of alcohol and live," Ness tried to understand Bower's immune system.

"Lookie me spike the punch!" The koopa king jumped up above the punch bowl and feel upon it with his back. "Ya get it hehehe, don't ya?" he sprayed the surrounding crowd with the drink.

"I get it! Hahahaha!" Gananodorf pointed at Bowser, almost as drunk as he is. 

"Stupid dinosaur, stupid evil guy," Zelda muttered and exited the room. As she left, Jigglypuff entered. Her eyes had sliver glitter placed on top of them. A light blush highlighted her shy eyes. A golden bow was carefully placed on her hair.

"Oh Kiiirby…" she called. The creature from Pop Star turned his attention from the food to Jigglypuff. He didn't turn back. 

"Oh, hi Jigglypuff," he unsurely answered. Unfortunately for him, random guests took the food from him with his back turned.

"Notice anything…different?" she twirled on her toes.

"You…you lost some weight?" 

"What?! Are you calling me fat?!"

"No! Of course not! I'm just…just…" Kirby closed his lips together.

"Just what?" Kirby flails his stubby arms about. Jigglypuff blinked.

"Are you trying to say something?" she edge closer to his face. Kirby backed up.

"Well? Spit it out! Do something!" her words got her want she wanted. A large belch erupted from his mouth that frizzed her hair. 

"Um….pardon me?" he ran off to hide from all the eyes that were starting at him. She managed to blink.

"That didn't go well."

***

            The princess of Hyrule gazed at the sparkling stars in the blackened sky. She was out at the balcony to get away from things.

            "Link, where are you?" she spoke to the gust of wind that fluttered her dress, hoping that the message will carry to her loved one.

            "You don't wanna know…" Young Link responded in a hushed whisper. He peered out the tiny window of his room and was in a good position to get Zelda. He looked at the clock on his counted.

            "Aw shit, 10 minutes till midnight." He turned back to his prize. He reached for an arrow and grabbed air for a while. He blinked and moved his palm around until he hit the projectile. 

            "One more left?!" he shouted in disbelief. He shrugged it off and armed himself with it. A knock on the door stopped him.

            "Who is it?" he put away the Cupid wear.

            "It's Nana," a soft voice said.

            "Um…come in?" he wasn't use to visitors.  The door slowly opened. The timid Nana peeked in.

            "Hi, um…I didn't mean to bug ya but…I gotta tell ya something." She blushed gently.

            "Er…go ahead and um…say whatever you wanna say," he wasn't use to girl around his age ether.

            "Well, since it's Valentine's Day and all…I just…just wanted to…to…" she looked down and mumbled something only she could hear.

            "You like me or something?" he didn't really mean this, but used the line anyway. Nana was stunned for a while.

            "Yes…I do have a…a…crush…sorta…kinda…yeah…"

            "You girls confuse me. What's the matter with telling guy ya like them? Not too hard. I kinda like ya too." Hope outlined her eyes.  "Beside, I knew that long ago."

            "You WHAT?!" Nana was now nervous and angry at whoever spilled the beans.

            "If you were drunk outta your mind, wouldn't you have told?" 

            "Was it a girl?" 

            "No."

            "A Pokemon?"

            "No."

            "Ness?"

            "What is this? Guess who? I'll tell ya. It was Popo. He drank too much Lon Lon milk." Nana grinned instead of running off in shame.

            "Umm…what are you thinking about?" 

            "Oh…just about how many firecrackers I can shove up Popo's ass." 

            "Firecrackers? You have some?" it was a good thing he was changing topics.

            "Oh. I have some in my pocket." She lifted out a handful of tiny TNT sticks. Young Link got an idea and tied them together into one long firecracker.

            "What are you doing?" 

            "Just saying "I love you" to Zelda in my own little way" he pulled out his bow from the hiding spot. Grabbing the string and the thin stick, he dipped the tip into a near-by candle and sent it flying. A loud crackle and a scream were activated. Nana saw the last love arrow poking out from under his bed. She picked it up while her crush was have the time of his life. She playfully poked him with it. 

            "Ey! That hurt a little!" he turned around and blinked at Nana.

            "Is there something wrong?" he was eerily quiet. He just hugged her in response. She raised an eyebrow and looked at the stick like thing she was holding. 

            "Wanna go make a death wish to Popo with fireworks?" he asked gently. 'Hmm, this is an interesting little object.' She thought.

            "Ok." She held his hand and started to her brother's room, still hanging on to the arrow. 

A/N: Yeah I know, crappy ending. I have another part though. ^_^


	5. Aftermath

            A/n: Sorry for the really really really really long delay. I got lazy n stuff. I won't make excuses this time. I would like to thank alllllll the people who took the time to read and/or to review it. Enjoy!  

Morning light cracked the barrier of darkness. Everyone returned to their respectful places for the night. Except for some. 

***

            Roy stretched out his arms and hung onto what they touched. His eyes still closed, he snuggled into the warmth. After a few minutes realizing that there's something else in the bed with him, he opened his blue orbs. His drowsy gaze brought him to a sleeping Link.

            "Oh fuck no!" Roy shouted before falling of the bed. Link woke with a jolt.

            "What? What happened?" he scratched his blonde head. He looked at the naked Roy on the ground. The hero of time almost jumped himself.

            "What the hell happened last night?!" they shouted at each other. Link chucked a pillow at Roy's waist area. They were blushing uncontrollably. 

            "Did you do this?" Roy looked accusingly at Link.

            "If I was drunk like a maniac, no! Did you?"

            "I would never ever do such a thing!"

            "Then why is my ass so sore?" The red head looked like he was about to puke. 

            "Holy shit! They got this on tape too!" Link pointed his finger to the camera.

            "I'll break it!" Roy grabbed his sword and started to slash and break the video recorder to pieces. After Roy's venting, the other swordsman looked at the pieces questioningly.

            "Where's the ribbon of tape that's usually _in a video tape?" A pause._

            "Uh oh…someone took it out."

***

            Sheik slowly regained her senses. First was her touch. Something heavy pushed her back onto what felt like dirt. Second was her hearing. Something was breathing, other than herself. Third was her vision, which brought up the rest of the senses. With everything collected, she analyzed and reacted. Falco was resting on top of her.

            "Crap monkey! Get off!" she swiftly twisted her legs upward to stand and to kick him off.

            "Damn…it's that time of the month already?" Falco glared at her from the ground. She hastily checked her clothes. Ripped open cloth and scars dotted her body. Falco have some feathers torn off with matching cuts.

            "What the fuck happened?" Sheik rudely asked.

            "Lemme check," He said, spotting a camera. Dusting it off, the blue bird hybrid rewound it and played it on the mini screen connected to the side.

            "Hey, look. You're chasing Fox," he snickered. Sheik frowned.

            "Lair. I wanna see," she shoved Falco off to the side and took hold of the tape recorder. The masked one barely got a fair look before Falco snatched it back.

            "Hey! I didn't get to see!" she lied. 

            "Too bad," he pushed her leaning face away from the screen. "I can't wait to blackmail Fox!"

            "Wait, you're gonna show that tape to people?"

            "Mmmaybe, why do you care?"

            "Dumbass, I'm in it!" she pulled out her needles and aimed for the camera. Falco eeped, stood up and ran. Sheik smirked as the tiny weapons landed on contact. The confused fighter was about to ask what use it had when the camera exploded. 

            "Hey! You owe me 2000 dollars now!"

            "Well, it's better than showing that to the smashers." Falco looked mischievously at her.

            "The 2000 is for the camera, not the tape." He tossed a rectangular object up, letting Sheik get a good look at it. She growled appropriately. 

            "Give that to me!" she charged at him. He sidestepped and watched her fall to the floor.

            "Nyah nyah." He grinned, starting to scamper away. She looked up from the dirt.

            "Not so fast!" she tossed one end of her chain to his legs that wrapped around them effectively. Falco fell with an 'oof' and tried to claw away from Sheik. 

            "Let go, you whorehouse reject!" his kicking did nothing but piss her off even more.

            "Here fishy fishy fishy!" she taunted. The fed up Falco whipped out his gun and repeatedly shot the chain until it broke. By then, Sheik was in tackling range. With a growl, she launched herself into him, trying to wrestle the tape out of his hands. A beam of red quieted them both, watching the tape fall to the ground. Many other beams followed after it, making the tape jump. They turned their head to where the production of lasers came from. It was a bit too late, because Fox threw the emptied gun onto the battered and shot tape with much anger. Fox's head turned so eerily, it could've been mistaken as a take from The Exorcist. The previously bickering two looked at Fox with a bit of fear. Fox glared at both of them. 

            "You two are a sick bunch of fuckers," he spat. Much relief left them as the angered Arwing pilot stomped away.

            "Now you owe me 2010 dollars."

***

            "Hurry it up!" Ness shouted. "I wanna take a swing at the sandbag too ya know!"

            "Beep boop bzzt click," Mr. Game and Watch replied. Of course, nobody understood him. The sandbag blinked questioningly at the 2d smasher. He's been standing in front of it for almost an hour. 

            "What's taking him so long?" Ganondorf asked Mario. The red capped one shrugged. 

            "C'mon Game and Watch! We don't have all day!" Luigi hollered.

            "Pichu chu pi!" Pichu didn't wake up early to wait. Mr. Game and Watch tried to ignore the complaints and lightly poked the sandbag. Then, out of a sudden burst of emotion, Mr. Game and Watch clung onto the sandbag and spoke words of apology in his tongue. 

            "What's up with this guy?" Ness asked. Everyone other than Mr. Game and Watch had the same question in mind. 

***

            Dr. Mario placed his clipboard down on Captain Falcon's temporary nightstand. 

            "You're lucky her metal boot hit your abdomen instead of your...." he trailed off, clearing his throat. The racecar driver looked a bit tensed and relieved. Peach came in with her white dress on and whispered something to the doctor.

            "Seems like you have a visitor," Dr. Mario said before leaving the room with Peach. Samus, dressed in her suit, stepped in. Captain Falcon paled.

            "Oh, no no. I'm not here to hurt you. I'm here to...um..." she strolled to his bedside and took a seat. 

            "To...?" he asked.

            "Uh...to....apologize to ya." she looked down at her feet after mumbling the last part. The racer smiled.

            "I'm healin'. It's ok with me as long as you don't do it again." He could feel Samus beam from behind her helmet. 

            "And I was here thinking that you were going to be an ass about it." Her voice seemed to make light of it. 

            "Nah, I couldn't hate you," he replied, smiling. Samus gave him a thoughtful glace.

            "Why not?"

            "'Cause…I can't." he said simply.

            "Tell me why."

            "No…it's ok."

            "Telll meee!"

            "No thanks."

            "Tell me!"

            "I pass." 

            "I'll annoy you." Captain falcon was getting amused.

            "Try it." After the dare was requested, Samus pressed a button on her forearm. Speakers of many sizes popped up from the corners of her body.

            "TELLMETELLMETELLMETELLMEEEE!"

            "Alright alright alright alright!" his hands were clamped over his ears. The female bounty hunter pushed the button and the speakers sunk back into her suit.

            "I love my new feature," she grinned.  "Now, what were you going to tell me?"

            "Geez, are you on a sugar rush or something?"

            "I had a cinnamon roll for breakfast. Besides that, why can't you hate me?" The former bounty hunter sank under his sheets and mumbled something. 

            "All I heard was a "You" and a "me". Now fill in the blanks!" He muttered something again. Samus looked at him with disbelief. 

            "You….your…." she started to say, trying to recover from the shock.

            "Yeah….I'm….afraid that you'll hurt me ok?" then he began his rant about what could happen to his face while Samus burst out laughing. 

            "Hey! I see what you do to Fox and your bounties!" 

            "So is that why you wear a mask?" she smirked. He nodded, to her surprise. The mecha smasher then thought of something.

            "What do you look like without your helmet thingy?" she poked his forehead. He shrugged.

            "Like a person?" 

            "No, I mean, like what color hair, eyes, etc." 

            "Oh! Uh…I'll take off my helmet if you do too." He grinned. Hell, everyone knows Captain Falcon has been in love with Samus. Except Samus, of course. People thought that she could really see well with the stupid helmet on.

            "Surrre…" she popped of her helmet and set it down on the bed. She looked at her companion.

            "Um….no offence, but you kinda look more stupider than you usually are." He stayed staring until Samus pulled of his headgear herself.

            "Hey!" he tried grabbing back the helmet, but Samus threw it across the room. Captain Falcon dipped his head under the blanket.

            "No fair! I didn't get to see!" she pulled on the bed sheet. The racer's fingers gripped tightly on it. 

            "I wasn't ready…" He spoke through the cloth, trying to escape. Samus pinned him down by his shoulders. 

            "Ready or not, lemme see!" she sat on his legs and took off the cloth from his face. Sandy blonde hair sprawled all over the pillow and deep brown eyes stared up at her.

            "Happy?" Samus lifted an eyebrow.

            "What's the big deal? You look normal!" She got off of him and crossed her arms. "Well….you do look pretty cute." He smiled at her and she returned it. She lightly blushed, turning her face away. Captain Falcon wouldn't allow this moment to pass. He gave her hand and pulled her down, planting a kiss on her lip in one swift move. He was expecting a slap in the face, but Samus seemed decided to relax and kiss back. 

            Mewtwo stopped to observe the two from the partly open door. He narrowed his eyes. 'Stupid humans.' He thought. 'Why does it take such a long time to do something so simple?' he floated away from them. A little black rectangular box followed him

***

                In another part of the hospital wing, Marth was regaining his consciousness. His fuzzy vision started to clear and he discovered where he was. And who he was next to.

            "Damn sick bastard's awake," he heard someone mumble. The blue haired prince tried to turn his head, but felt a sharp pain around his neck. He groaned in pain.

            "Haha, looks like I kicked your ass real good," the voice said again. Interestingly, there was a mirror prepared for Marth to look around the room. He discovered that he was covering in casting and bandages. His right leg hung in front of him and Popo was lying in the bed next to him. He was in worse shape. He looked more like a cocoon. 

            "How'd you land here?" Marth croaked. Popo looked a bit embarrassed.

            "Ehh, my sister got me in here. The only thing she didn't do was break my neck." He cleared his throat to show that it's why he could speak.

            "Why…?" Marth started. The male ice climber already knew what the question was.

            "I told her crush that she liked him. I thought it'd be funny." He looked at his condition. "I guess I was wrong. Either way, she likes someone else ok?"

            "Wh-what are you…talking about?"  

            "Did I hit you on the head too hard?! Hello! You were practically after her the whole day yesterday!" Marth groaned as he tried to remember. 

            "Bah, deny it all you want. She has a boyfriend now, if you haven't noticed." He shifted his eyes to the window planted on the door. It was easy for Marth to see who was outside, but it wasn't easy to take in.

            "Nana…and Young Link?"

***

            Quiet and cozy, Young Link watched the time go by. Nana was lightly leaning against his shoulder, napping soundlessly. Numerous thoughts chased around the young boy's head. Does anyone remember anything about last night? Will anyone find out it was his fault? What will happen to the smashers now? Instead of sighing, he smiled. It was all fun and games. And with him and Nana, well, they decided to be good friends until they were old enough to know what real love is. Young Link sure as hell doesn't know. The pink clad ice climber stirred and rubbed her eyes.

            "What time is it?" she mumbled. 

            "Still morning." 

            "Oh, that helps." Nana helped herself sit up. She yawned and turned her attention to the Yoshi that stopped in front of them.

            "There's a meeting Mewtwo wanted us to come to. Wanna go?" the dinosaur asked. They both shrugged.

            "Sure I guess," Young Link replied, seeing no harm in it. Nana quietly agreed and waved good-bye to Popo as they went by the window. 

***

            Everyone in the movie room was confused, but still chattered. Waiting for Mewtwo wasn't too long. Waiting for everyone to quiet down was.

            "GODDAMNIT SHUT THE FUCK UP!" the extremely annoyed Pokemon shouted. All eyes were on him now. He cleared his throat and began. 

            "I bet you're all wondering why you're here. Well, it's to see a simple video tape I found around the Smashers' home." He waited for people to mumble their comments. Roy and Link looked nervously at each other. 

            "This video show 100% NC-17 (A/N: YA HERE THAT FF.NET?!!? NC FUCKING 17!!) and I would like to ask the younger smashers to leave the room." The psychic cat watched Ness, Nana, Young Link and Pichu leave. He continued. 

            "What you are about to see may affect you in a mental disturbing way. Now, any who have a weak heart, please leave." People were getting impatient. After more of Mewtwo's ranting, he started the video. What was projected in front of the adult smashers utterly surprised them all. 

***

            The youngsters just finished a game of Sorry when the rest came out. The children saw the variety of expressions on their faces. Some were disgusted, some looked evilly amused. Comments like "Dinky Link" or "His equipment doesn't match" were made. Of course, the kids didn't know what they were talking about, but saw Zelda screaming at Link. A very bruised and bloodied Link. Everyone watched the Princess shout profanities and words of disgust before leaving. Roy had disappeared during the screen and is probably hiding with Kirby. 

            Link had collapsed after everyone was gone. He muttered about death to Mewtwo and how much his head hurt. Young Link stayed, telling Nana to go off somewhere else. The youngest swordsman leaned over Link, grinning.  Link slightly opened his eyes to look at the up side down looking Young Link.

            "Love hurts, don't it?" 

A/N: YAY! It's done! Whoooo! 


End file.
